Today’s debate is a beastly battle between two playground legends. It’s Slides vs. Swings! Comedian Tim Platt zooms towards glory for team slides while comedian, actor and writer Fareeha Khan soars through the sky for team swings. Who will be crowned the Smash Boom Best? Vote below for the team YOU think won!

Also… do you have your Smarty Pass yet? Get yours today for just $5/month (or $45/year) and get bonus episodes every month, and ad-free versions of every episode of Brains On, Smash Boom Best, Moment of Um and Forever Ago. Visit www.smartypass.org to get your Smarty Pass today. As an added bonus, your Smarty Pass will grant you access to a super special debate starring Sanden and Molly!

Audio Transcript

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MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: From the brains behind Brains On!, it's Smash, Boom, Best.

CHILD 1: The show for people with big opinions.

MOLLY BLOOM: Hi, I'm Molly Bloom, and this is Smash, Boom, Best, the show where we take two things, smash them together, and ask you to decide which one is best. Today's debate is a beastly battle between two playground legends. It's slides versus swings. In one corner, we've got comedian Tim Platt, ready to sizzle for Team Slides.

TIM PLATT: Yeah, I'm going to slide into first place because-- I mean, to win this competition.

MOLLY BLOOM: And in the other, comedian, actor, and writer Fareeha Khan is here to soar for Team Swings.

FAREEHA KHAN: Hey, gang. Let's swing our way to the stars today. I love magic.

MOLLY BLOOM: [LAUGHTER] And here to judge it all is Henry from Columbus, Ohio. Henry is on his school's debate team, has a hamster named Pop Rocks, and once got to miss school for a whole week for a show he was in. So, Henry, what made you want to start debating?

HENRY: Smash, Boom, Best.

MOLLY BLOOM: Wow. I'm really honored that we inspired you to start debating. I want to know about Pop Rocks.

HENRY: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: Does Pop Rocks have a sizzling personality?

HENRY: Well, she certainly does. She is always around. And whenever she's in her ball, she always just wanders. I mean, one time, she even got out of the cage and was around the house for, like, two days.

INTERVIEWER: Two days?

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh.

HENRY: We caught her, though. She's back in her cage. She's back in her cage.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, Pop Rocks wanted to explore. So have you been on both swings and slides in your life?

HENRY: I most certainly have.

MOLLY BLOOM: Do you have any favorite swing or slide experiences you'd like to share?

HENRY: Well, my dad built a swing set in our backyard. So obviously, that always has been a fun thing to do. Just when I have free time, I go outside, listen to music, and swing.

MOLLY BLOOM: Mm.

HENRY: But I love slides. They're just awesome for all occasions, especially in water slides, which I'm hoping those count.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, absolutely.

INTERVIEWER: Yeah.

MOLLY BLOOM: So you're an experienced debater now, and you've been listening to Smash, Boom, Best for a long time. Do you have any advice for our debaters today?

HENRY: Well, I just wanted to say from my debate coach, no absolutes. And also, you always want to keep a nice happy tone. You never want to make it sound really bad.

MOLLY BLOOM: Mm. OK, we don't to go negative.

HENRY: Yes, never negative.

MOLLY BLOOM: And the absolutes-- can you just describe a little bit more about why absolutes are a bad idea?

HENRY: Yes. So absolutes, they can be rebutted very easily--

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, smart.

HENRY: --in a regular debate. If you use an absolute, and the other team has a way to negate that, you are in a lot of trouble.

MOLLY BLOOM: So if you're like, that's never happened, and then your opponent's like, actually, it happened a couple times--

HENRY: You have dug yourself into a very, very deep hole.

MOLLY BLOOM: That is great advice. Well, will Henry side with Tim or Fareeha? Only time will tell. But first, here are the rules of the game.

Every debate consists of four rounds-- the Declaration of Greatness, the Micro Round, the Sneak Attack, and the Final Six. After each round, our judge, Henry, will award points to the team that impresses him the most. But he'll keep his decisions top secret until the end of the debate.

Listeners, we want you to judge, too. Mark down your points as you listen. At the end of the show, head to our website, smashboom.org, and vote for whichever team you think won. All right, Tim, Fareeha, and Henry, are you ready?

TIM PLATT: Yeah, I'm ready.

FAREEHA KHAN: I'm ready to go.

HENRY: I'm ready.

MOLLY BLOOM: Then it's time for the--

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: Declaration of Greatness.

[TRUMPET SOUND]

MOLLY BLOOM: In this round, our debaters will present a well-crafted immersive argument in favor of their side. Then they'll each have 30 seconds to rebut their opponent's statements. We flipped a coin, and Tim, you're up first. Tell us what makes slides so spectacular.

TIM PLATT: Growing up, I was always a slide kid. I remember this park I went to, and it had everything. There was a miniature train--

[TRAIN WHISTLE]

--a spinning set of monkey bars.

[MONKEY WHOOPS]

It even had a talking pig-shaped trash can called Porky the Litter Eater.

PORKY: Hi, kids. I'm Porky the Litter Eater, and I sure like to eat.

TIM PLATT: And in the center of it all, like a big shiny beacon, was the biggest metal slide I'd ever seen. I remember the first time my parents let me go down it.

CHILD TIM: Wow. That's the biggest metal slide I've ever seen. Mom, Mom, can I go?

MOM: I think you're ready, Tim. Go for it.

CHILD TIM: This is the best day of my life!

MOM: They grow up so fast.

TIM PLATT: When I finally went down that huge slide, it was like a rite of passage. For the first time, I felt like a big kid. Climbing those stairs up to the top was like my Mount Everest. After taking so long to climb, I flew to the bottom so fast. I couldn't wait to climb up and do it all over again.

But over in the corner of the park, well, that's where the swings were. I had this friend. Let's call her Faree-- uh, "Shmareeha." She was a-- ugh-- swings kid.

[UNSETTLING MUSIC]

I'd be sliding down the slide, having the time of my life, and then "Shmareeha" would just be swinging, swinging, swinging, back and forth all day. [SHUDDERS]

[LIGHT MUSIC]

Slides, on the other hand, make you feel like you're really doing something. Swings are so repetitive, back and forth and back and forth until it's time to go inside-- boring. With slides, there's anticipation. You climb up and stand at the top and the wind in your hair, the excitement builds, and when you slide down, ooh! It's a real payoff.

CHILD TIM: Yahoo! This is the best day of my life!

TIM PLATT: And once your feet hit the bottom, you can just go and do something else on the playground. Slides are like a perfect course in the feast of fun that is recess.

HOST: Welcome to Chez Recess. Tonight's specials are an amuse-bouche of the monkey bars, a side salad of the delicious cedar plank seesaw-- mm, so good. And to pair with that, might I recommend a main course consisting of a full bodied trip down the slide?

PATRON: Hmm, yes, please.

TIM PLATT: Speaking of variety, slides come in all shapes and sizes, from tiny plastic playground slides to big metal ones to huge towering slides, like the famous 60-foot-long wooden slide at Philadelphia's Smith Playhouse. That was one of the first slides ever built on a playground in 1904.

[PIANO MUSIC]

WOMAN 1: Step right up, folks. Experience the talk of the playground world-- the slide. Who needs swings with all that pesky leg pumping? A slide does the work for you. Just walk on up and slide on down. You there, man with the scowl. What do you say? Care for a slide today?

MAN 1: Oh, you kids and your newfangled technologies. Mark my words. Slides will never catch on. Next you'll probably say those new cars are going to replace my horse and buggy. Ha!

TIM PLATT: And we haven't even talked about the real ace in the hole. Two words-- water slides.

[WATER SPLASHING]

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

Try the Rise of Icarus water slide in Wisconsin. It is the biggest water slide in the United States, standing almost 150 feet tall. Or try the Reef Plunge slide in Florida, where riders zoom in clear tubes with a huge tank filled with dolphins and tropical fish.

[DOLPHIN CALLS]

And slides aren't just exciting. They bring people together. They teach us how to share and take turns, which helps us learn how to become a better person. And they teach us about working hard to reach a goal. The pure joy of getting at the bottom of the slide is always worth the effort of climbing up that ladder or stairs. Whether you're playing in a big group or just by yourself, there's just no substitute for a slide. It's the pinnacle of the people's playground.

MOLLY BLOOM: Wow. That argument for slides was quite the ride. Henry, what stood out to you about Tim's argument?

HENRY: Well, I loved the part where he talked about slides possibly being like a main course of the park. As a person who adores food, I can tell you that that was a very compelling and delicious argument.

TIM PLATT: Mm, OK. My compliments to the chef. And in this case, I mean you.

MOLLY BLOOM: Speaking of food, I'm also stuck on that pig trash can that eats garbage. But we'll talk about that later.

TIM PLATT: We'll talk about that later.

MOLLY BLOOM: Fareeha, it's time for your rebuttal. Tell us why slides should hide. You've got 30 seconds. And your time starts now.

FAREEHA KHAN: Sure, Tim, slides are fun. But you can only go one at a time, OK? And that big metal slide you were talking about from the playground you went to, now that slide, on a hot summer's day, it's going to burn your buns right off.

TIM PLATT: OK.

FAREEHA KHAN: Skin is lost in the process. Yet with a swing, you can swing up and out of this day into another dimension.

MOLLY BLOOM: Ooh.

FAREEHA KHAN: And simply being in motion--

TIM PLATT: And time.

FAREEHA KHAN: --can make your mind feel different.

[LAUGHTER]

TIM PLATT: Oh, yeah, I got a few things to say about this. One at a time? Yeah, well, at least one at a time, we know exactly the length of time that someone's going to be on the slide. If someone's on the swing, they can take as long as they want going that back and forth.

You could be in a one-person line, and it'd take half an hour. Lost skin? Yeah, that could be a problem. I'll admit that could be a problem.

[LAUGHTER]

I'll admit that'd be a problem. And I appreciate you bringing it up. What's a little fun without a little pain, OK?

MOLLY BLOOM: Whoa.

TIM PLATT: We can all agree with that. Another dimension? You want to go to another dimension? I like to stay in the here and now. I like to stay--

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, OK.

TIM PLATT: --on this planet, on this Earth. And as I stay on this planet, I want to see the highest points and the lowest, which the slide gives you ample opportunity to see.

FAREEHA KHAN: Whoa.

TIM PLATT: All right. Fareeha, it is your turn now. Please tell us why swings are king.

[PLEASANT MUSIC]

HAMMOCK SWING: Hey there. You just stumbled on the 2024 swing family reunion. Lucky you. We've got swings from all over gathering to spend time with family. Over here, we've got Tire Swing from Texas sipping some sweet tea.

TIRE SWING: [SATISFIED SIGH] Howdy.

HAMMOCK SWING: Over there is Old Man Porch Swing.

PORCH SWING: I used to be FDR's porch swing. Now those were the days.

HAMMOCK SWING: And, of course, there's little Playground Swing having a high flying time.

PLAYGROUND SWING: Look at me. Look at me. Mom, Mom, Mom, Mom!

HAMMOCK SWING: And me? I'm just a humble hammock swing. It means the world to me that my family has come together to celebrate the love that is swings.

FAREEHA KHAN: Wow. Swings really come in an impressive variety of shapes and sizes. And this playground favorite has been delighting people for thousands of years.

[LIGHT MUSIC]

Swings have been around for so long that it's hard to say who invented them. They've appeared all over the globe at different times. The ancient Greeks used them, the ancient Egyptians used them, and they were huge in the '80s. So ancient Americans used them, too. Just ask your parents.

Straight up, if you were cool back in the day, you were probably riding a swing. And they weren't just fun rides. Swings were part of art displays, cultural ceremonies, and celebrations. In ancient China, swings were used in festivals and acrobatic displays, just like today.

MAN 2: Look at that strong, elegant woman flying through the air back and forth. How is she doing that? Is she a wizard, a god, an angel come to Earth?

WOMAN 2: It's just a little girl riding a swing. We really need to get you some glasses.

MAN 2: She's magnificent.

FAREEHA KHAN: People all over the world love swings, and they use them in different ways. Some are just great to look at, like the Giant Swings in Thailand, which were once used to re-enact the Hindu creation of the Earth but are now just a cool tourist attraction.

WOMAN 2: Look at that gorgeous swing. I'd ask to swing on it, but like I said, it's just too gorgeous.

FAREEHA KHAN: Others are used for sports, like in Estonia, where they have a swing game called kiiking. In this game, a person is fastened to a swing and has to swing all the way over the top to win.

[ENERGETIC MUSIC]

COMMENTATOR: Welcome back to the sports zone. We've got top kiiking athlete Amber Flip here to tell us how she won today's match.

AMBER FLIP: Well, first I went up, and then I went down. Then I went up, and then I went down. Then I went up.

COMMENTATOR: Let me guess. Then you went down again.

AMBER FLIP: No. I kept going up and went over the swing because I am a champion.

COMMENTATOR: Incredible. Coming up next, we have a report on today's international slide competition, where everyone came in last.

FAREEHA KHAN: Now, the swing you're probably most familiar with is the good old playground swing. And it's a good thing we have them because kids get so much out of swinging. It teaches them about rhythm and full-body coordination, strengthens the core, helps build motor skills, and, most importantly, teaches you how to play with your friends.

On a slide, you're by yourself hurtling to the ground like a spitball through a straw. But on a swing, you can be by yourself or side by side with your friends. Most swing sets have multiple seats. So you can fly with your fellows, soar with your schoolmates, ascend with your associates. What a delight.

As a kid, I used to swing with my friends all the time. We'd have epic swinging competitions to see how high we could fly. We would have had slide competitions, but unfortunately, a slide only caters to one person at a time-- truly isolating ride, if you ask me. Whether it's a crowd looking for a show or friends looking for some fun, swings are the treat that comes with a seat.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, that went back and forth and back and forth, and it felt so very good. Excellent work. Henry, what stood out to you about Fareeha's declaration of greatness?

FAREEHA KHAN: Well, I really liked all the social stuff. In the swing set in my backyard, me and my brother would always swing together. We would sing songs and see who could swing the highest. And, yeah, I would do that with my friends as well on the school playground. So, yeah, I really relate to that.

MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent. Well, Tim, it is time for your rebuttal. Tell us why swings stink. You've got 30 seconds, and your time starts now.

TIM PLATT: Fareeha begins by saying swings are old. Cool, I guess. So they belong in museums and everywhere else except the backyard.

Yeah, we talk about all these different coolest things you could do that you have to be an Olympic athlete to use, well, like swinging all the way around. A slide is for everybody. I don't need to strengthen my core to use a slide.

And in terms of this community thing, yeah, the community you get by waiting in line for someone who's taking half an hour to use their swing and won't get off, yeah, this is a community that is based on the person who's in control--

MOLLY BLOOM: And time.

TIM PLATT: --of the swing at the time while the slide is equal for everybody.

MOLLY BLOOM: [LAUGHTER]

FAREEHA KHAN: I'm just a bit-- I'm a bit blown away, honestly. And I disagree with the way you described the swings. The swings is for community. It's not an isolated experience the way the slide is. And I just disagree with that.

TIM PLATT: I guess if I can-- may I?-- just to say real quick that, you know, sure, it's for community. It's a community chosen by the most powerful--

FAREEHA KHAN: That is not true.

TIM PLATT: --i.e. the person or the people who are on the swings--

FAREEHA KHAN: That is not true.

TIM PLATT: [INAUDIBLE] time. So a little community but you're not a part of the privileged.

FAREEHA KHAN: You're talking you're about it from a New York City perspective.

TIM PLATT: OK.

FAREEHA KHAN: There's many places all over the country where there are many swings for every man and child and woman and nonbinary person as well.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Henry, you've heard a lot. It's a heated debate so far. It's excellent. There's a lot to think about. But it is time to award some points. Please give 1 point to the Declaration of Greatness that you liked best and 1 point to the rebuttal that won you over.

You get to decide what makes a winning argument. Did one team's jokes make you giggle? Was another team's logic impeccable? Award your points, but don't tell us who they're going to. Have you made your decision?

HENRY: Yes, I have.

[BELL RINGS]

MOLLY BLOOM: Excellent. Fareeha and Tim, how are you two feeling so far?

TIM PLATT: I just want to say, in the spirit of competition, things get intense, then we get passionate about our sides. But I respect my competitor.

FAREEHA KHAN: Yes. I respect you, too, Tim. You're a friend of mine. I don't want to take you down too hard.

[LAUGHTER]

TIM PLATT: I accept that playful jab. And I will say-- I will say also that I actually am a big supporter of core strength. And so I was very interested to hear you bring it up. And the older I get, the more I realize that the value of core strength. It helps the whole body.

MOLLY BLOOM: Well, it is time for a quick break. Climb up the stairs and get your legs pumping, and we'll be right back with more Smash, Boom, Best.

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: You're listening to State of Debate, home to raging rhetoric and awe-inspiring argumentation.

TODD DOUGLAS: Good morrow, debaters of state. 'Tis I, Todd Douglas.

TAYLOR LINCOLN: And I, Taylor Lincoln. And we're speaking all Shakespearean because we're at the Renaissance fair.

TODD DOUGLAS: I can finally wear my elf ears, not to mention our super snazzy matching fairy wings.

TAYLOR LINCOLN: The green really brings out your eyes, Todd. So far, it's been a blast, except we just spotted a logical fallacy.

TODD DOUGLAS: Logical fallacies make arguments easy to defeat, and we just saw one yonder at Ye Olde Cabbage Stand. Check it out.

[FILM REEL]

WOMAN 3: Ooh, that cabbage looks divine. I've never seen blue cabbage before, only red or green. Is blue cabbage a Ye Olde Cabbage Stand special?

GIZMO: Good observation. I know this cabbage looks blue, but it's actually red cabbage.

WOMAN 3: What the what?

GIZMO: Well, red foods like cabbage get their color from acids. So when we heat it up in a pan or boil it in water, the acid cooks off the cabbage, and it turns blue.

WOMAN 3: I don't believe it.

GIZMO: It's science. And look, you can add the red color back to the cabbage by adding more acid, like some of this vinegar. See?

WOMAN 3: [GASP] It's turning red again.

GIZMO: Pretty cool?

WOMAN 3: Gizmo, I simply can't believe that cabbage does this naturally. Therefore, it must be magic. Magic, I say.

GIZMO: It's simply science. No tomfoolery here. [LAUGHS]

[BUZZ]

TODD DOUGLAS: We just spotted the personal incredulity fallacy. That's when someone says something isn't true just because they find it difficult to understand.

TAYLOR LINCOLN: Just because you don't understand how something works, that doesn't mean you can dismiss it entirely.

TODD DOUGLAS: Right. That's why it's important to ask questions like, how does that work, or, can you give me another example, or, hey, Taylor, want to split a giant turkey leg?

TAYLOR LINCOLN: No.

TODD DOUGLAS:

TAYLOR LINCOLN: We'll catch you next time on--

BOTH: State of Debate.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: Brains On! Universe is a family of podcasts for kids and their adults. Since you're a fan of Smash, Boom, Best, we know you'll love the other shows in our universe. Come on, let's explore.

[JET WHOOSHING BY]

WOMAN 4: Smash, Boom, Best, I'm their biggest fan. I also love Brains On!, a fun science podcast for kids. Listen, I will play you Brains On! You will love.

[BEEPING]

MOLLY BLOOM: Today, we're going to turn our attention to blood-suckers that do exist.

[FURTIVE MUSIC]

CHILD 2: Some of them you've probably heard of, like mosquitoes, ticks, and lice.

MOLLY BLOOM: But others might surprise you. Like, did you know that some birds drink blood?

[BUZZ]

[BEEP]

WOMAN 4: Zorp! Where did the signal go?

[BEEPING]

Must find Brains On! now.

[BOOM]

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: Listen to Brains On! wherever you get your podcasts.

[WHIMSICAL MUSIC]

MAN 3: Best.

WOMAN 5: Boom.

WOMAN 6: Smash. Smash--

WOMAN 5: --Boom--

MAN 3: --Best.

MOLLY BLOOM: You're listening to Smash, Boom, Best. I'm your host, Molly Bloom.

HENRY: And I'm your judge, Henry.

MOLLY BLOOM: And we love getting debate suggestions from our listeners. Take a listen to this wild debate idea from Jack.

JACK: Hi, my name is Jack, and I am wondering if we can do moose versus pheasant.

HENRY: A perfectly "pheasant" idea.

MOLLY BLOOM: We'll check back in at the end of this episode to see which side Jack thinks should win.

HENRY: And now it's back to our debate-- slides versus swings.

MOLLY BLOOM: That's right. And it's time for round 2, the--

[WHIMSICAL TONE]

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: --Micro Round.

MOLLY BLOOM: For the Micro Round challenge, each team has prepared a creative response to a prompt they received in advance. For Tim and Fareeha, the prompt was "Pundemonium," where each debater had to come up with three puns for their side.

Tim went first last time. So, Fareeha, you're up first. Let's hear your first pun for Team Swings.

FAREEHA KHAN: Sometimes you're trying to swing higher than the kid next to you, but you can't do it. That's what we call a swing and a miss.

[LAUGHTER]

Cheers.

MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Tim, now it's your turn. Let's hear your first pun for Team Slides.

TIM PLATT: I can totally see myself getting married someday. But instead of kissing the bride, I'd prefer-- and you're not going to believe this-- to kiss the slide, because I want to be married to a fun time at the park.

[LAUGHTER]

Wow. Check. Got to do a little check next to that.

FAREEHA KHAN: Wait till your wife hears that.

TIM PLATT: Oh, well, she'd respect it.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Fareeha, let's hear your second pun.

FAREEHA KHAN: When I'm feeling down, I like to have a nice swing session because it helps me feel uplifted.

[CYMBAL CRASH]

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. Excellent work. All right. Tim, now it's your turn for your second pun.

TIM PLATT: My friend recently lied to me. I didn't appreciate it. Then I had another friend "slide" with me. And you're not going to believe this. I didn't appreciate it. Wait your turn. I slide alone.

[CYMBAL CRASH]

[LAUGHTER]

FAREEHA KHAN: Ah, the individualist pursuit comes back for more.

TIM PLATT: I guess I believe in rugged individualism.

FAREEHA KHAN: Yeah you're a real capitalist.

TIM PLATT: With restraints.

FAREEHA KHAN: Just like my dad.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Fareeha, let's hear your final pun for Team Swings.

FAREEHA KHAN: OK, OK, look, I'm an introvert. But sometimes, I like to pop by my friend's house for a few hours, then go back to exploring my own world. I just swing on by.

We eat snacks, I play with their super cute cat Fluffy, and then sometimes we go for a walk together. Little doses of happiness with your friends is fun when you can swing it. Double pun mic drop!

TIM PLATT: Whoa!

[LAUGHTER]

That's a double pun. So OK, so--

FAREEHA KHAN: Sorry about it, brother.

TIM PLATT: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: OK, Tim, it's your last chance to give us a pun for Team Slides.

TIM PLATT: In ancient Rome, the 15th of March was known as the Ides of March. For me-- and you're not going to believe this-- the 15th Slide of March is known as March 1. I go down 15 slides a day, you see.

[CYMBAL CRASH]

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my goodness. Excellent work, or should I say, "punderful" work, both of you.

TIM PLATT: Ah.

MOLLY BLOOM: Henry, what did you like about Tim and Fareeha's Micro Rounds?

HENRY: Well, I thought that they were very funny, in their own special way.

MOLLY BLOOM: [LAUGHTER] And--

FAREEHA KHAN: Thank you, Henry.

TIM PLATT: Thank you.

HENRY: I liked they weren't just like simple puns. They were very exaggerated and storylike puns.

MOLLY BLOOM: Yes, they had narrative. It was very impressive.

HENRY: And for Tim, you said something about the Ides of March. And--

TIM PLATT: Yes.

HENRY: --don't disrespect my birthday again.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh!

TIM PLATT: [GASP]

MOLLY BLOOM: Your birthday?

FAREEHA KHAN: Wow.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh.

TIM PLATT: Well, [STAMMERING] I didn't know. I didn't know. Of course, no disrespect at all. In fact, much respect. The 15th, it had a special name. [STAMMERING] If you think about it, it's actually respect to your birthday. So [STAMMERING] can I have some water, please?

[LAUGHTER]

HENRY: Don't worry, I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man. All right. Henry, this is going to be a hard decision, but it's time to award a point. Have you made your decision?

HENRY: I think that I have.

[BELL RINGS]

MOLLY BLOOM: Fantastic. Then it's time for our third round, the super stealthy--

VOICES: Ha ha! Hoo! Ha!

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: Sneak Attack.

MOLLY BLOOM: This is our improvised round where debaters have to respond to a challenge on the spot. Today's sneak attack is called Dinglehopper. Your challenge is to list three uses for your side other than what they're really used for. For example, if your side is marshmallows, you could be like, "Marshmallows make the most amazing beds ever. You've never laid on anything so plush."

You'll volley back and forth, and we'll start with Tim. Debaters, does this make sense?

TIM PLATT: Yes.

FAREEHA KHAN: Yes.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Tim, let's hear your first alternative use for slides.

TIM PLATT: A lesson in friction-- have you ever climbed up the slide part of the slide? That's going to teach you not only a whole lot about friction and surfaces and surface tension. But also, climbing up the front of the slide, you are working muscles that you have never known in your life-- weird arm muscles, weird leg muscles, and actually, now that I think about it, probably your core too.

So if you go up the slide from the opposite direction, not only are you going to learn about the physics of this world, but also, you're going to give yourself a workout the likes of which have never been seen.

MOLLY BLOOM: Wow.

[LAUGHTER]

A workout for your brain and your body. Fareeha, it's your turn. What else can swings be used for?

FAREEHA KHAN: Let's say you have to deliver a package to a bird, and you needed--

[LAUGHTER]

You needed to do it yesterday. You're pumping your legs on the swing. Bam, you're there. Tell the bird to meet you there, 3 o'clock, top of the spot. And you hand them the package. Bing, bang, boom, done. Package received by bird.

MOLLY BLOOM: So good. All right, Tim, it is your turn. What's your next alternative use for slides?

TIM PLATT: Let's say you have to deliver a message to a groundhog.

[LAUGHTER]

And they're straight down the ground. How are you going to get them out? You don't have a drill.

Wait a minute. Do you have a heavy rock and a slide? Push that rock down the slide again and again and again. And eventually, you will dig through the pressure of the rock down the slide into the ground. You will dig a hole deep into the center of the Earth, where the groundhog is waiting patiently for their message.

[LAUGHTER]

FAREEHA KHAN: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: Practical. All right, Fareeha, it's your turn. What's your next alternative use for swings?

FAREEHA KHAN: Well, we mentioned that swinging can be a bit of a meditative activity. Let's say you're on the swing. You're clearing your head. All of a sudden, next thing you know, you're connecting to the angels around you.

You're getting downloads. You're getting your most creative ideas yet. You're about to make the best comic, idea, play of your life. You go to the swings, it brings out your creative genius. Yeah, I'm talking touch the sky.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, wonderful. All right, Tim, it is time for your final dinglehopper for slides.

TIM PLATT: You know, I've been combative this whole time, but, you know, I love my friend Fareeha. I got so much love for people. In fact, I think this world needs more love.

In fact, I think this world needs so much love that I would love it, personally, if we could spell the word "LOVE" in big letters, you know, and make a big L. That's easy. Make a big O. You can make Big Os anywhere.

But the big V-- where can I find a big V to spell "LOVE"? Wait a minute. If I just turn this slide upside down, I suddenly have the big V in the big spelled out "LOVE." And for an E, I can invite you to engage with your own imagination, only Vs in there.

But for the V, for the V, an upside-down slide might just be the ticket. And now look at me. I'm on a plane up in the sky. And I look down, and I see the word "LOVE." The world has changed for the better, thanks to slides.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Fareeha, it is time for your final dinglehopper for swings.

FAREEHA KHAN: Thank you so much. And listen, I love my buddy Tim.

TIM PLATT: Aw, come on.

FAREEHA KHAN: He's got a mind of his own, I'll tell you. The way-- the things that come out of this guy's minds, I just say, whoa, didn't expect that one.

TIM PLATT: Yeah, that's not a pun.

FAREEHA KHAN: But here's the thing. You actually inspired me, my friend--

TIM PLATT: Oh?

FAREEHA KHAN: --because the E in the word "LOVE" you are looking to spell could be seen by three swings, three best friends on the three swings on the playground, swinging each at an angle that creates the perfect E to end the word "LOVE." The world is better for swings on the playground as well, and friendship is yet again at the center.

MOLLY BLOOM: This is love. This is teamwork. This is friendship. This is beautiful. But, Henry, only one of them can receive a point. So you're going to have to think about which side impressed you the most and award your fourth point for this sneak attack. Have you made your decision, Henry?

HENRY: Boy, this was a hard one, but I have.

MOLLY BLOOM: Wonderful. Then it's time for our final round.

[WHIMSICAL MUSIC]

MARLEY FEUERWERKER-OTTO: The Final Six.

TIM PLATT: In this round, each team will have just six words to sum up the glory of their side. All right, Fareeha, let's hear your six words for the sweetness of a swing.

FAREEHA KHAN: Swing to the stars and enjoy.

MOLLY BLOOM: Mm.

TIM PLATT: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: Very nice. All right, Tim, it's your turn. Tell us why slides are so sublime using just six words.

TIM PLATT: Climb up. Slide down. You're perfect.

[LAUGHTER]

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, man, these are so good.

TIM PLATT: And then you can be anyone. You can be Henry. You can be the listener. You can be the slide itself. I'm open to interpretation.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right, Henry, it is time to award a final point for this Final Six. Have you made your decision?

HENRY: Yes, I have.

[BELL RINGS]

MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Tally up those points, my friend. Are you ready to crown one team the Smash, Boom, Best?

HENRY: I have tallied.

MOLLY BLOOM: All right. Drum roll, please. And the winner is--

[DRUM ROLL]

HENRY: Swings.

[TRUMPET SOUND]

FAREEHA KHAN: Oh, my god! Oh!

MOLLY BLOOM: Wow. I could not be more elated.

TIM PLATT: Oh. Well, I'm happy for you. Great job, Henry. Great job.

MOLLY BLOOM: Thank you.

TIM PLATT: I really respect your take, and I appreciate your time.

FAREEHA KHAN: Yeah, yeah, no, Tim.

TIM PLATT: And, Fareeha, you did a really good job.

FAREEHA KHAN: Thank you so much.

TIM PLATT: You did such a good job.

FAREEHA KHAN: No.

TIM PLATT: It was so crazy.

FAREEHA KHAN: You were really great, too.

TIM PLATT: Thank you.

FAREEHA KHAN: You made it hard. You brought a lot of strong arguments. I was sweating, I'll tell you, the whole time.

TIM PLATT: Yeah, well--

FAREEHA KHAN: I am just-- I'm really honored, Henry, that I won you over. Can I ask you what it was?

TIM PLATT: Yeah. Yeah, actually, actually, Henry, I would also like to know what it was.

FAREEHA KHAN: What was it? Was it the magical element?

HENRY: I will say it came down to the Final Six as a tiebreaker.

MOLLY BLOOM: Wow.

FAREEHA KHAN: Oh, my gosh, that's crazy.

MOLLY BLOOM: As close as close can be.

TIM PLATT: The Final Six were perfect.

FAREEHA KHAN: Wait, wait, well, how'd you decide? How'd you decide?

HENRY: So the Final Six, I really liked your "swing to the stars and enjoy." I thought that was just awesome.

FAREEHA KHAN: Aw. Thank you, Henry.

MOLLY BLOOM: I loved yours too, Tim. Don't worry.

TIM PLATT: OK.

MOLLY BLOOM: But it was as close as close can be. Both had 2 points up to that moment.

HENRY: Certainly was.

TIM PLATT: I appreciate it, Henry. I appreciate it. And if I could just say, I respect your choice. You have been a diligent and fair and logical judge, and I appreciate that. And even in loss, even in loss, it is a privilege to be treated fairly in this world.

FAREEHA KHAN: Aw, wow.

TIM PLATT: And you treated us both fairly.

MOLLY BLOOM: Thank you.

FAREEHA KHAN: And you know what? I want to say the same thing. Thank you for the opportunity, Henry. And, Tim, you were a great competitor.

TIM PLATT: And so were you. In fact-- and people at home can't see this, because they can't see anything that's happening, but we're shaking each other's hands. You can't hear it, either, because it doesn't make a big sound. Let me try-- maybe it makes a sound if I do this.

[SOFT MOVEMENT]

FAREEHA KHAN: Did you hear that? That's our hands being shook.

TIM PLATT: Yeah.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

MOLLY BLOOM: Well, that is it for today's debate battle. Henry crowned swings the Smash Boom Best. But what about you?

HENRY: Head to smashboom.org and vote to tell us who you think won.

MOLLY BLOOM: Smash Boom Best is brought to you by Brains On! and APM Studios. It's produced by me, Molly Bloom--

ANNA WEGGEL: --Anna Weggel--

MOLLY BLOOM: --and--

ARON WOLDESLASSIE: --Aron Woldeslassie.

MOLLY BLOOM: We had engineering help from Derek Ramirez, Gary O'Keefe, and Dalton Jones, with sound design by Anna Weggel. Our editors are--

SHAHLA FARZAN: --Shahla Farzan--

MOLLY BLOOM: --and--

SANDEN TOTTEN: --Sanden Totten.

MOLLY BLOOM: And we had production help from the rest of the Brains On! Universe team--

ROSIE DUPONT: --Rosie duPont--

RACHEL BREES: --Rachel Brees--

ANNA GOLDFIELD: --Anna Goldfield--

NICO GONZALEZ WISLER: --Nico Gonzalez Wisler--

RUBY GUTHRIE: --Ruby Guthrie--

LAUREN HUMPERT: --Lauren Humpert--

JESS MILLER: --Jess Miller--

JOSHUA RAY: --Joshua Ray--

MARC SANCHEZ: --Marc Sanchez--

MOLLY BLOOM: --and--

CHARLOTTE TRAVER: --Charlotte Traver.

MOLLY BLOOM: Our executive producer is Beth Pearlman, and the APM Studios executives in charge are Chandra Kavati and Joanne Griffith. Our announcer is Marley Feuerwerker-Otto. And we want to give a special thanks to Austin Cross, Taylor Kaufman, Lulu, and Andy Doucette. Tim, is there anyone you'd like to give a shout out to today?

TIM PLATT: My kitty cat, Honeybee.

MOLLY BLOOM: [GASP] My dog's name is Honeybee.

TIM PLATT: Are you kidding me?

MOLLY BLOOM: No.

TIM PLATT: Wow.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh.

TIM PLATT: Wow.

MOLLY BLOOM: Oh, my gosh. All right, Fareeha, how about you? Any special shoutouts?

FAREEHA KHAN: I would like to give a shout out to my special kittens at home, Ziggy and Zuzu.

MOLLY BLOOM: And how about you, Henry? Any special thanks or shoutouts?

HENRY: Yeah, I would love to dedicate this whole episode to Dexter, my brother. And as well as-- if we're talking about pets, my dog, Peter, my family, and my debate coach, especially, Ms. Daniel.

MOLLY BLOOM: Shoutout, Ms. Daniel.

HENRY: And the dream team-- you know who you are. We won three trophies together for a debate.

MOLLY BLOOM: Amazing.

HENRY: So this, uh, whole thing was because of them, too.

MOLLY BLOOM: Aw. And Dexter, shoutout to Dexter. Before we go, let's check in and see who Jack thinks should win the moose versus pheasant debate.

JACK: I think moose will win because they are larger and have better defense and are a very interesting animal.

MOLLY BLOOM: If you're between the ages of 13 and 18 and you'd like to be a judge, or if you're any age and you have an idea for a knockdown, drag-out debate, head to smashboom.org/contact and drop us a line. And make sure to subscribe to Brains On! Universe on YouTube where you can watch animated versions of some of your favorite episodes.

We'll be back with a new Smash Boom Best debate battle next week, Bluey versus Elmo. Bye-bye.

HENRY: Peace.

FAREEHA KHAN: See you later, folks.

TIM PLATT: Goodbye.

[LAUGHTER]

[THEME MUSIC] Ooh, you're the Smash Boom Best

Ooh, put you through the test

Ooh, you're the Smash Boom Best

Ooh, better than the rest

It's the Smash Boom Best

It's Smash Boom Best

FAREEHA KHAN: Oh, come on, brother. Give it a rest.

TIM PLATT: Sorry, I had to.

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